诗酒：女儿抗癌札记（9,10,11,12)

DING!

女儿抗癌札记（10）上

3-4-2012 (星期日)

六周的時间过得飞快，小诗的放疗完全结束了，这对小诗和诗嫂来说都是一大解脱。过去这六周里，诗嫂每天陪着小诗来回三四个小时去做放疗，身心都疲累得很。最后这两个星期，小诗心里也正经历着极大的波动：舟车劳顿加上看不见出路的郁闷；这一个多月来看着我们跟医生的窃窃私语、身边朋友如潮水般的慰问和关心，越来越让她感觉到事情的严重。但是她潜意识地把这种惧怕压抑下去，表现出来的却是对上帝单纯的信心。如前篇所说，她觉得如果上帝要医治她，一定是不会要她经受痛苦和不快，反之，凡是让她感觉不舒服的都不是合乎上帝心意的，这包括吃药、看医生、抽血化验，甚至到最后我们为她煲的汤、熬的水、煮的菜，都一概不吃不喝。被逼得急了就委屈地哭，指责我们对上帝没有信心。

她这样强烈的信心是我们对付小瘤的最佳武器，所以我们只能引导不能打压，但是眼看小诗放疗之后严重贫血，而她一天吃不了一碗饭、喝不到一瓶水，我们怎么能够放任不管呢？放疗给我们买来几个月的缓冲时间，一刻都耽误不起啊，所以这些天来我们都苦恼得很。尤其做妈妈的，天天战斗在第一线，跟病魔斗法，跟时间斗快，现在还要跟孩子斗智，每天心里都积满了焦虑和无奈。本来我们以为只有小孩子才会对上帝有这种一知半解的信心，没想到周五收到的一封信，把我们重重地摔进了迷惘和痛苦之中。

身边的一位朋友，一直关切着小诗的病情，小诗刚发病的时候，就来跟我们说，这是因为我们祖上积累下来的罪孽，报应在孩子身上，要来替我们认罪悔改。周五又给我们发来电子邮件，并且一个上午连续发了三次，又加上电话提醒，追问我们看了没有，其迫切程度足以媲美宋高宗发给岳飞的十二追魂令。这封信很长，中心思想就是把上帝和医生对立起来，指控我们一面信上帝，一面却去求医生，是不够敬虔的表现。这位朋友质问我们：“所信的究竟是谁？”并且断言我们“这心背后是诡诈，是自欺，是随波逐流，是麻木，实则就不是神所要的信。”最后，这位朋友站在小诗的立场，呼吁我们“不要再逼迫这孩子了。。。你们软言细语地逼迫还不够多吗？你们把自己的意思强加在孩子的身上了，没有她喘气的机会，不给她信心的空间，她的话你们只是当作耳边风，她的灵魂你们代作主张，她的信心你们视而不见，她滴血受伤的心，你们自始至终没有安慰到她的痛处，反而是在痛处撒上盐，并且告诉她，‘亲爱的，我们爱你！这一切都是为了你好。’”

中国有句老话，叫“打落牙齿和血吞”，我们现在恰恰就是这个心情。满腔的冤屈都只能咽回肚子里，生怕一开口压抑不住，就会出言不逊，更加坐实了我们不够敬虔的指控。

首先，我们肯定这位朋友对孩子的一番爱心，但是凭爱心撒在伤口的盐也是一样的痛，嚼在嘴里也是一样的苦涩。今天早上，这位朋友在教会看到我们，又拉着我们说要为我们认罪悔改，不然灾难将会越来越大！我和诗嫂相对默然，心里只是想着圣经里面，约伯遭遇苦难却被朋友武断为罪有应得，他对天哭喊却叫天不应的凄凉光景：“你们安慰人，反叫人愁烦。。。我的朋友讥诮我，我却向神眼泪汪汪。。。我朋友阿，可怜我。可怜我。因为神的手攻击我。你们为什么仿佛神逼迫我，吃我的肉还以为不足呢？。。。我平日所爱的人向我翻脸。。。神夺去我的理，全能者使我心中愁苦”。

离开教会的时候，在交通灯前面停下，恰巧手机收到当天的灵修经文，按平日我是顺手把它关了就算了。今天因为心里困苦，就低头看了一眼，今天寄来的是上帝说的一句话：“我岂没有吩咐你吗？你当刚强壮胆。不要惧怕，也不要惊惶。因为你无论往哪里去，耶和华你的神必与你同在。”（约1:9）

霎时间，多日的劳苦愁烦、对孩子的罪咎感、对父母的亏欠感、对外人强颜欢笑的无奈感、对自己的良心感觉无辜又无助的恐惧，终于都有了倾诉的对象。其实，在身边朋友的爱心中，无论是网上的网下的，主内还是主外的，我们清楚地知道我们没有被遗弃，但是这样直接对灵魂的冲击与安抚，却从来未曾有过。我再也忍耐不住，眼泪如涌泉迸浆一样喷涌而出，索性就在车里放声大哭起来。

湖畔居士

引用第54楼匿名于2012-03-07 12:32发表的 女儿抗癌札记（10）上 :
女儿抗癌札记（10）上

3-4-2012 (星期日)

六周的時间过得飞快，小诗的放疗完全结束了，这对小诗和诗嫂来说都是一大解脱。过去这六周里，诗嫂每天陪着小诗来回三四个小时去做放疗，身心都疲累得很。最后这两个星期，小诗心里也正经历着极大的波动：舟车劳顿加上看不见出路的郁闷；这一个多月来看着我们跟医生的窃窃私语、身边朋友如潮水般的慰问和关心，越来越让她感觉到事情的严重。但是她潜意识地把这种惧怕压抑下去，表现出来的却是对上帝单纯的信心。如前篇所说，她觉得如果上帝要医治她，一定是不会要她经受痛苦和不快，反之，凡是让她感觉不舒服的都不是合乎上帝心意的，这包括吃药、看医生、抽血化验，甚至到最后我们为她煲的汤、熬的水、煮的菜，都一概不吃不喝。被逼得急了就委屈地哭，指责我们对上帝没有信心。
.......

谢谢这位朋友转贴。我把（10）一起请到主楼。
让我们都来为小诗和她父母祝福吧！

caohong

诗酒所有善良的心都在虔诚的为小诗祈祷，所有善良的心都是您的精神支柱。带小诗看医生没有错，无论结果如何，您没有愧对。活着就应该坚强起来，快乐起来，才无愧于生命。

weiqi

文中的那位朋友，把对未知领域似是而非的个人解读，不分场合强加于人，即使是出于好心，也未必妥当。
道在人间的各种解读，都是道在人性中的折射，所有宗教都不是道的本身，而是不同的人在不同时候的理解。谁也没有最终的解释权和强加权。
尊重他人信仰方式，让求道者有自己的空间领悟提升吧，

耶穌過去的時候，看見一個人生來是瞎眼的。門徒問耶穌說：「拉比，這人生來是瞎眼的，是誰犯了罪？是這人呢？是他父母呢？」耶穌回答說：「也不是這人犯了罪，也不是他父母犯了罪，是要在他身上顯出　神的作為來。 约翰福音9：1~3

Work so that God can answer your prayer.  Modern medication may be just the gift from God.

I think you should ask that person who ask you to refuse medical treatment to check himself into a mental hospital.

The following two stories are ZT

1)
There is a story about a man trapped at home during a terrible storm. He soon realizes the house will be flooded, and he climbs to the roof. As the waters rise, he prays to God for salvation. Just then, a neighbor appears in a rowboat. But the man refuses to get in. “I’m waiting for God to rescue me,” he says.

A little while later, a sheriff’s deputy arrives in a motorboat. Still the man refuses to get in. “I’m waiting for God to rescue me,” he says again.

Then, with the water lapping at his feet, a helicopter descends from the clouds and drops a line to the stranded man. But he still won’t leave the rooftop. “I’m waiting for God to rescue me,” he shouts.

Inevitably, the man drowns in the flood waters. When he arrives in heaven, the man asks, “God, why didn’t you answer my prayer?”

“Are you crazy?” replied the Lord. “I sent you a rowboat, a motorboat, and a helicopter! Why didn’t you get in?”
God answers in unexpected ways

You’ve probably heard that story. It’s an old joke. But it meant a lot to me when I first heard it. I’m just the kind of guy who would look at the rowboat and not recognize God’s hand in the rescue offered to me. It is also a clever way of making the point that God always answers our prayers, but not always in the way we expect.

I believe that it is true that God always answers our prayers. But it isn’t always easy for me to believe it. There are a lot of tragic things that happen in the world that many good people pray about. And yet the tragedies still happen. There are difficult times in my own life, and I always pray about them. Sometimes the difficulties are resolved—usually in ways I don’t at first recognize. And sometimes it seems like there is no resolution. It seems like God isn’t listening or perhaps I’m not praying hard enough.
Three things to know about God

There are three things that help me believe that God does always answer my prayers.

First, my life is so filled with blessings that it almost seems ungrateful to point out the blessings I think I deserved but didn’t get. If God is so outrageously generous in 99 percent of my life, why would God deny me the measly one percent I might think that I’m lacking? Perhaps God did answer me—and the answer was “no.” The situation is akin to a parent who would gladly give her child anything—unless it wasn’t right for the child at that time.

That leads to my second understanding. I try to remember that God’s timeline is way bigger than my timeline. Perhaps what I’m asking for might not be right for me at this moment. Or, perhaps it is not right for someone else. The most difficult example of this, for me, is when someone I love gets sick and dies. No matter how many prayers are sent heavenward, the sick person doesn’t always recover. I don’t have a clear understanding of why this is. All I know is that sickness and death are part of the human condition. If God were to remove that condition, we’d be somehow less human. Understanding that doesn’t make it any easier for me to lose a loved one. But the loss doesn’t mean that God is not listening. I think God grieves as much or more than I do. I live in hope that there is some good that will eventually come from my loss that I cannot recognize right now.

Finally, I remember the lesson in the story above. God may be sending me all kinds of answers that I’m not recognizing. To remedy that, I pray that I try to open myself to God’s will, and I try not to dictate the terms.

Publisher Marc Allen has a simple phrase he uses to begin his prayer, and I’ve adopted it. Every day, I start my prayer by saying: “In an easy and relaxed manner, in a healthy and positive way, in its own perfect time, for the highest good of all I pray”¦.” That usually helps me keep from worrying too much that God isn’t answering my prayers.
Has God answered your prayers?

Now I’m wondering about your thoughts on prayer. Do you believe God answers your prayers? Have you ever had your prayers answered in ways you did not expect? Are there times when you felt like your prayers were not answered? Please reply in the comments box. And if you know someone who is struggling with prayer, please forward this post to them.

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2) Did You Buy A Lottery Ticket?

By InnerChi Balance

Over the years, I have heard different variations of a story of the story of a man who prayed to win the lottery. In fact, just the other day, I heard someone tell the story of this story in a movie. It’s a very simple story, but the story of the story contains a very profound message, nonetheless.

THE STORY!

There was a man who prayed to a stone god, “Dear God, please help me to win the lottery! Please, God, please! Help me to win the lottery.” The next day, the man prayed the same prayer. “Dear God, please help me to win the lottery! Please, God, please! Help me to win the lottery!” And, the next day he prayed the exact same prayer! “Dear God, please help me to win the lottery! Please, God, please! Help me to win the lottery."

Now the story goes that the man prayed this prayer day after day, month after month, until one day something happened. The stone god came to life and stood before the man and said, “Dear Son, please! Please, Son, please! Buy a lottery ticket!”

BUY A TICKET?

Buy a ticket? Who would have thought that this man did not already have a lottery ticket? This man was obviously a praying man who had faith. The story says he prayed day after day and month after month.

The first time I heard this story, up to that particular point, I felt like I had better “get on the good foot” and pray my prayers a lot more often. Praying every other day, and sometimes days in between those days, was not going to get it. Then I heard the rest of the story. And, I got it! I mean, I really got it!

WORKS!

I recalled a Bible scripture that, in essence, says FAITH WITHOUT WORKS IS DEAD! Again, this man had faith. Remember, he prayed to his stone god day after day and month after month. But, he hadn’t bought a lottery ticket. In other words, he hadn’t any works!

I then began to wonder about the reasons the man hadn’t bought a lottery ticket and just what would it have taken for him to do so. And, I wondered how many or even how often should he have bought a ticket, especially as much as he was praying. And, then I thought, “Didn’t he know he had to at least buy ONE ticket in order to win the lottery in the first place.” Because, I am more than certain that what his stone god really wanted to say to him was, “Please, Son, please. At the very least, buy one lottery ticket. Although, you probably should buy a few more tickets on a regular basis. There are a few others ahead of you on this one.”

I guess you can tell that this story really made me think. So much so, I began to think about what I had been praying for and wanting to attract into my life and whether or not any of my works were in accordance with my prayers or what I wanted to attract. And, also, if I had had enough works! Even the law of attraction involves some action to be taken from time to time. In other words, I had to check to see if I had “bought my lottery ticket”.

WELL...

After reviewing the indications of the calculations (as my brother is always telling me), I can honestly say that over the years, there have been a few times that I have prayed for or wanted to attract something and did not “buy the lottery ticket”. This was a light bulb moment for me! Could I have really obtained more of the things that I had wanted if I had worked in accordance with my prayers? Or, if I had taken the necessary steps or done the work required of me, would I have attracted to me, what I had wanted? Yes, indeed! My “works” had been the missing key!

ACTION IS VITAL!

Although I can go on and on and on about WHY our prayers or what it is we want to attract to us should be supported by action, I won’t. It should already make sense. Whether our works are inspired or we already know what to do, it is imperative that we do something!

Here are just a few thoughts to consider:

    Have you taken the first step in accordance with your prayer or what it is you want to attract into your life?
    If not, jot down your reasons why you have not taken the first step and determine whether or not your reasons are more valid than taking the first step.
    If you have taken the first step, have you planned the next step?
    Do you have a plan in place to continue stepping in the direction of your prayer or what it is you want to attract into your life?
    Everyone needs to know “why” they are praying for or wanting to attract whatever it is they are praying for or wanting to attract. You may have to refer to your “why” in the instance you are faced with challenges. Do you know your reason "why"? If not, take some time to think about "why" and write those reasons down. I have heard that your reason “why” should make you “cry”!

Whether you believe in prayer or the law of attraction, the principle is the same. Works, which are in accordance with your prayers or what you want to attract, will be required of you. If you want to win the lottery, you have to buy a ticket!

BlueSky

天下父母的苦心都是一样的。你们做得够好了。对于不能理解你们的人，随他去吧。

大家都会一道为你们全家祈福。

杨子

不断的祝福！

Your "Friend" is a jerk. Totally biased, nerdy.  

You need only listen to a doctor's advice, not anyone from your church or your bible study class where there are more people with mental problems than regular guys like you.  .

Do not give up praying, but never replace medcine with prayers!!!